it will break
don't go

selfishly

I plead
I cry
I scream at you

it's delicate
this thread 
attaching we

my eyes are scooped out
my tongue torn from me
my ears boxed

i care not

for
i still feel
your heart touch

a little note
full of beautiful

words
left at my door

a knock

on the cabinet
in my chest

opening
me 
a little more

I don't want to die
but I want to disappear

I don"t want to kill
but I want you dead

I don't want to hate
but I want you to feel empty

I don't want to live 
but I want to stay alive

I don't want to be lonely
but I want to be alone

I don't want to hurt
but I want to be human

I don't 
but I do

i feel comfort
in the night
in the corner

where i can't see

my hands
my pain
my heart

always hungry
always eating

You reach
for me
and
you need me
to reach back

but 

I can't

 I sat alone
in a hole
watching

no one stopped

or came

or peered

then

then
there was you

I am a lighthouse

jutting

peering

judging 

watching

alone

sometimes
when you're in a good mood
it hurts me

i know
it's not your fault

but still

i blame you